Through February I mostly wrote about my view on spirituality and related topics. This month I want to cover various controversial questions that ravaged man from ancient times. One of those questions is happiness. What is happiness?
Today, a friend of mine stopped by at my place. We had coffee. The commotion lasts roughly until blunt is rolled. From the first inhale, an inexpiable softness aroused the senses. Depression depresses on fields of negative thoughts, climate change and we were ready for stellar topics. Conversation went on and we asked ourselves. What is happiness?
I always strive to give an answer to every question. Today, I had to pause myself. Did I know what happiness is? Do I even comprehend it as a phenomenon?
At first, I found silence in long sips of coffee. I watch my friend hit the blunt. I look at him. He tries to explain to me what is happiness to other people. Still, we don’t have a clue with what we are dealing with. My ceiling offers no answers either.
Let’s try and find some facts or observations on happiness. Most people don’t know what happiness is. Yet, for most people goal they are trying to achieve is happiness. But when asked, what happiness is, they don’t have an answer. What’s even more puzzling is fact that we could actually ask multiple sources and get multiple answers. Still, we wouldn’t have a complete answer. We could ask a priest or monk what happiness is. However, chances are we aren’t going to be satisfied with answer. We could ask a therapist, psychiatrist or psychologist and get an answer. Without doubt, it will not make us any wiser. As we examine the answers, we can spot a hurdle ahead of us. Problem isn’t theoretic in nature, it’s practical. As always, theory has to be tested and proven in practice. Most theories on happiness are worth revising.
Conversation ventures further. We discuss what happiness is for both of us. My friend is an adventure type of person. He really lives life. He loves to go out, meet new people, drink and experience new things. For him, lack of bondage in traditional views social propriety and economical support to pursue the adventure is happiness. For me, happiness is equal to security. I love that feeling in the morning when you wake up, make coffee, read morning news, check out your accounts and prepare for work today. Also, I love living without drama and social pressure. I want to live content life. For me that’s happiness. Still, we don’t have an answer to the question. What is happiness?
Blunt is finished, yet its eternal glory lives in our lungs, preparing a bright star to engulf the conversation. As we aren’t able to answer the question from contemporary stance, we ask about past. Examination goes on. We were both afflicted with powerful impulses which raged in adolescence. When I look back, I remember drinking a lot. I remember life then, and I’m happy I’ve changed. Suddenly, a glimpse of hope awakens.
Currently, I’m happy. In reality, I don’t care what happiness is. Maybe, I don’t want to know and maybe I shouldn’t. For a long time I wanted to stop being sick. I was sick with myself. Wherever I looked I sought to find a mystic presence, gateway to Earth’s paradise. I never found it. I think most people fail at being happy because they don’t know what makes them happy in the first place.
My friend and I agree at some point that having security is equal to being happy. That doesn’t sound too romantic, but it’s rational. People tend to romanticize happiness as a supernatural state which magically occurs at predestined point in our lives. They tend to believe that if they lose weight, they’ll be happy. In most cases, this reasoning fails. When person loses weight, they don’t become hot or good looking. Truth is, in most cases people lose weight and then have to work toward creating a desired body. People tend to believe that if they hook up with a certain person, they’ll be happy. They hook up with that person only to find out that person is wrong for them.
Contrary to the popular belief, happiness doesn’t reside in our pursuit. Happiness is the product of the pursuit. Whatever you accomplish, it will not automatically make you happy. Happiness comes from within.
Again, I couldn’t offer such explanation to my friend. Both of us would know how far this kind of advice could take us. Then again, what is the foundation of happiness? If our goals can’t help us to reach happiness and our thriving isn’t enough, what is? Maybe the measure of happiness is achieved when you are able to enjoy a lifestyle of your choosing. I believe this to be an answer to question of happiness.
Before anything else, happiness is a personal exploit. There is no formula for happiness, only blueprint. When I say blueprint I mean a method to ensure the possibility of achieving a lifestyle. Only thing that could help you is to find what works for you and do that. After much discussion, my friend and I agreed that happiness is individual thing. How does an individual find what makes him happy? To me, this seems as a more urgent question than the original. When do we become happy?
Spirituality and happiness
To truly become happy you have to find yourself. If you want to do so, first thing is to get to know your being. You can do that if you practice spirituality. Spirituality is passionate attentiveness. You have to find with what you will be passionately attentive about. Find a hobby, activity you love or just about anything. Commit to it.
First, partaking in activity through spirituality helps you relax and heal. As more as you partake in such activity, more will you get to know about that subject. The depth of the subject will reveal its secrets to you. However, something else will occur. You will get to know yourself a little better. You’ll get to know your being.
This is the main thing. If you want to know what makes you happy, just get to know your being. You won’t understand yourself if you don’t understand your being. If you pursue this, soon, need to uphold that state of mind will prevail in you. You’ll find values that will allow you to keep that state of mind through time. This will make you happy. After that, comes the sweetest part.
As you dwell in hidden world of being, the activity through which you found spirituality is the activity you’ll master. After you master it, you’ll be able to change its rules, change its form and shape it to your liking. Man is a creator and great freedom of his resides in creativity. Do what you love and be creative with it. Explore it. Even try to make money from it. Create your lifestyle. Master yourself and you’ll be happy.
In the end, my friend left and I went on to write this post. Is he happy? Honestly, I don’t know. I hope he is. But am I happy? Could I say that and if I can’t, what gives me right to write this article? I ponder on the subject. I’m happy. Of course, there are things in my life that require urgent fixing. I’m working on them. There are many things that could improve my life, but I don’t have them at the moment. I’ll get them. But do I, for the first time in my life, have peace of mind? Yes I do.
For the first time in my life, I can choose to be spiritual and pursue spirituality as my lifestyle. I’m the master of myself. I choose what I wish to. This makes me happy.
Michael of Moon
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