If someone asked what was the hardest part of writing, I could answer right away. The hardest part of writing is freeing oneself.
I don’t want to answer in terms of a high end wisdom. Life is a thing when you embrace the inevitable, the job, the kids and peaceful degredation which is death. I want to talk about freedom. Freedom to be who I am.
Let’s get one thing straight right away. I don’t advocate for unresponsible behavior. I don’t put the sign equal between the two. When I say free, I mean free to express who I am. I find this to be incredibly hard for most people I ever met. The problem lies in finding the right way to unleash what’s in us. Good and bad alike. I don’t want to discriminate against my “bad” side. People aren’t good or bad, they aren’t Gods. They are just people. People make mistakes and therefore, people should be forgiven. Even forgiven, people should become better and grow. Yet there are people with needs, hungers and desires that stir up the normative which dictates what’s normal or acceptable. These people are shamed, discriminated and alienated from the rest of society. We are all different, no doubt. The others are strange, but so we are. I only met such phenomenon in human nature, a possibility to become anything. While this stands, people should have right to do what makes them happy, as long as it doesn’t bring harm to others. Again, we are so strange to each other.
You go online and you see people in your Facebook newsfeed. You see the memes they love, pics of other people they like, but what do you see? Is their taste accustomated to their inner being, or is it something to be percieved as socially acceptable? Who is the real you?
The internet is so great because it allows us to experience our being in various dimensions. Today, you can publish books and music on it, and even have websites and blogs. This is awesome. As my exploration in spirit economics went further, I had to put this to test. Yet, something was lacking. I couldn’t let myself go all the way. That’s very wrong. You have to go all the way. In order to release what’s truly in you, your artistic, divine potential, you have to embrace what you are. That’s truly erotic. To be able to truly accept oneself, both good and bad, and to release it in something beautiful, that’s erotic. Make it divine. You can do it, any person can. You may don’t want to accept it, you may hate the term, but you are a Moonborn.
For days, I wanted to write poetry. Everything I wrote was moist with bland negativity poisoning my life. And there I was thinking poetry was art, meant to be beautiful. Actually, I believed in my ugliness, it pursued me to view everything as ugly. I was ugliness. I walked and talked pure spite, what I touched turned to dust. But I continued writing, trying to employ what I named spirituality. Using the untested concept of spirit economics I tapped into an alien river dwelling in me. I found beauty, not as single entity waiting to be defined, but as an act of artistic realese. Such realese is sex, if it is erotic. It becomes erotic when you put the totality of your being in what you do. That’s when it becomes holy. Are you angry? Are you sad, depressed? Scared? Feel fear? Good, that’s great, that’s how it should be. But use it, use it to better yourself. Take everything you have and throw it in fire of spirituality and build on it. Use spirit economics to free yourself. Be your own person. Enjoy life, be Moonborn.
I wrote for days after days. I don’t count anymore. I won’t. I changed. My problem was that I believed that I’m inherently evil. I made mistakes. I can’t make all of them right. I can change. I will not repeat them. I will take care of myself and become not just someone whom others will accept. I will become a person I can truly respect, then others will acknowledge me.
You can be free and be accepted as you are. The problem is not within you, it’s in how you deal with it. Remember, anything is art, as long as you are treating it as an art.
Also, my Ebook, the first installment of Contemporary portraits is avaliable for sale. Since the book will come out in installments, each installment will be 1$. The Ebook is available through a few services. You can find it here and here.
P.S. What you consider an art that you enjoy doing?
Michael of Moon
You can check my previous article “Labels”, here. You can follow me on Twitter or Facebook. If you are interested in my view on spirituality you can purchase my Ebook Introduction to spirituality, also available on Kobo and Inketera. You can purchase my fiction Ebook, God is us here.